Reverb11: Excited to start!

My friend Mary participated in a Reverb last year, and while reading her Reverb10 while traveling last year I thought it was a great idea and knew that I would participate the next year if I was stationary.  So here I am, stationary, living with my parents again after living abroad for over 2 years, and the upside?  I have daily internet access so I can participate in Reverb11.


What is Reverb you ask...it is very simply put, a reflection on 2011 and a look towards 2012.  When you sign up for Reverb11 you get daily prompts emailed to you to write about, video about, draw about...you get the idea.  


Although I am a few days late getting started I'm going to catch up and then keep up. 

Day 1: Encapsulate the year 2011 in one word. Explain why you are choosing that word. Now, imagine it's one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2012 for you? 

The last 3 years of my life have proved to be very eventful and exciting.  At the start of 2011 I was in Indonesia.  I began this year on Gili Trawangan, and island off the coast of Lombok in Indonesia.  I was viciously ill with food poisoning all day New Years Eve, but was determined to still go out with my boyfriend at the time and his friends.  I was nursing a bottle of water the whole night, but still glad I had gone out.  Seven days after 2011 began, my boyfriend and I flew to Vietnam, from there we went to Laos, then Thailand.  We parted ways there, he went back home to Indonesia, and I continued as planned on to India.  I spent 3 incredible months in India studying yoga, meeting some of the most incredible people in the world, eating amazing food, and opening my heart and mind even more than they already were.  

In May, I finally booked my flight home to Canada, despite my urge to go to Indonesia.  Arriving home was scary, as the unknown always is, but it felt right for me at the time.  

In 2011, I have experienced a lot of change, the last 3 years really have consisted of a tremendous amount of change, but I feel as though this year has more than any other year.  

This year I was in Asia to start, I returned home after 2.5 years away, I moved in with my parents, I became a first time Auntie to a beautiful little girl, changed careers again after finding an amazing job, ended a relationship that I thought was "it", have met some amazing new people, have reconnected with many friends, and have realized that some friendships will never be what they once were.  Looking back on 2011, I loved, laughed, and certainly lived, but I feel as though I could have lived more...I don't know how, it's just a feeling, but I feel that there has to be more. 

So, I would love for my 2012 word to be live.  I know that seems very vague, perhaps seems like a cop-out, and I don't even know exactly what I mean by that, but at this time next year I want to be able to say with pure confidence that I lived.  That I accomplished things I thought impossible for me, that I was myself wholeheartedly, and that I did everything with love, joy, and happiness.  That is my wish.      

If you want to join in on this tremendous experience, it is certainly not too late, click here, sign up and get started! 

Thankful Thursdays V.2

My day started out well.  I taught a yoga class to 18 High School students this morning, and it was a remarkable way to start my day.  They were all focussed and energetic and unlike my first class with them last week, they didn't make a peep throughout the whole class.  It was fabulous!

Unfortunately my day didn't go the way one would expect it to given its start.  Around 3 o'clock I developed a headache, and stomachache...neither of which being something you want when you have to teach 2 more yoga classes.  The stomachache only got worse, which by the time my 5:30pm class rolled around i was feeling quite horrid.  After the class I drank gallons of water, well maybe not gallons, but certainly a lot!  Thankfully I had 2 hours to start feeling better before my next class, and even more thankfully, I did start to feel better.  My energy level rose, my stomachache washed away, and I started to get pumped to teach.

My class flew by and it felt great.  The energy in the room was positive, invigorating, and inspiring.  After the class I was filled with a calm energy that, honestly I hadn't felt in a few days.  So I closed up the yoga studio, blasted some of my favourite songs, and sang my heart out.  Which (finally), brings me to what  I am feeling ever so thankful for today.  I am thankful for music.  Music of any kind really.  I have a deep respect for anyone who writes and sings with their heart on their sleeve.  It is extremely courageous to sing for others, especially when the words have come from the heart and soul of the person.  

Music soothes my nerves, lifts my heart, and warms my soul.  

I want to share one of my favourite songs to belt out in the bath right now, so enjoy!  

Honour the ordinary with Thankful Thursdays V.1

I got home from work this evening around ten o'clock, honestly hoping to have a new episode of Greys Anatomy to watch, and it wasn't on tonight because it is the American Thanksgiving.  So being one of the only tv shows i watch and instead of finding some other mindless show to watch in its place, I took to my laptop to find something new to watch on TED.com.  Obviously checking facebook first to see if anyone had sent me something important (not likely, but there's always hope), I saw that two of my girlfriends had linked to the same TED talk today...so naturally I clicked on their link to see what all the fuss was about.  It took me to a stunningly gorgeous piece of art, both visually and audibly, by Louie Schwartzberg on Nature, Beauty, and Gratitude.

As usual, after a TED talk that touches me deep inside my soul, I feel inspired and seek more inspiration and beauty, so I turn to "what to watch next", and there I clicked on another talk.  This talk, by Laura Trice, on saying 'thank you', was very short and sweet, but powerful.  One of the conversations, started in part by Laura Trice's talk, asked the following questions:

If you wrote 52 thank you cards (or emails, texts, blogposts, etc) a year to honour the ordinary, who would you write to and what would it be about?

How do you feel about incorporating Thankful Thursdays, to make it a habit to send one thank you out a week?

Again feeling inspired, and it coincidently being a Thursday, I decided I would start this weekly journey for myself.  

Every time I teach a yoga class I always ask my students before they leave to honour their body, their mind, and their breath.  It is a very powerful thing to honour these three amazing things that we very rarely do thank, whether because we just are not mindful enough to do so, or because we take them for granted.   

So today, on my first Thankful Thursday, I am going to start with doing what I do everyday, and thank my body for all that it accomplishes for me every single day, thank my mind for being as present as possible for me at every moment, and thank my breath for being aware and helping me consistently move forward.

Find your joy!

Being a yoga teacher, I am constantly reading books and articles on being present in life, opening your heart, awakening dormant energies in our bodies, and other such things that will help improve my yoga practice and ultimately my life.  Things that I can therefore carry with me to my classes and pass on to my students.

One thing that I often say in class is "find your joy!", usually set in the context of holding Warrior 2 for five long breathes and I try to encourage my students to focus on something other than the burn so they don't kill me.  This theme is something that, although I say it to kill the silence and distract students from their burning muscles, is also meant to plant a seed in those receptive minds, that they can use in their yoga practice, but can also carry it through to their life off their yoga mat.

As Canadians, we often lose sight of our joy, the things in life that cultivate happiness and bliss.  Generally speaking, we don't lose our joy due to poverty, famine, civil wars, lack of education, and therefore lack of job prospects.  Typically, we lose our joy due to trying to keep up with the jones', and therefore overworking in jobs we dislike, commuting long distances to get to those jobs, buying homes that put us in economic strain, eating "quick" food due to lack of time to prepare healthy meals, putting on excessive amounts of weight, spending our hard earned money on crazy quick fix schemes to lose that weight, and ultimately being "required" to work even more at the job we hate just to keep the deadly and unhappy cycle going.  It is an exhausting life if we let it be, and honestly after living in Asia and traveling in all of the countries I have, I see that in most cases even those who are faced with truly difficult living conditions and circumstances still have joy, and happiness, and generally on a more consistent basis than we do in our comparatively comfortable lives.  They know how to find their joy.  They make time for those things, and keep everything in perspective.

I am not at all an expert on joy, I would love to be one, but I don't think that they actually exist.  All I can do is draw upon things I read, feel, and experience and hope that I can develop a strong understanding of how to find joy, and then the even harder task, how to keep that joy coming on a consistent basis.

I have been trying to cultivate a life for myself where I consistently have joy.  It is certainly more difficult since having come back from Asia, and I have run off the track a few times since coming home in May, but after having read my dear friend Mary's blog post the other day about "joy triggers", I decided to put it all out there, following suit with Mary, and answering her question:     

"What things bring me joy?"

Yoga...quite simply any one yoga posture will instantly brighten my day...standing on my head, a backbend of any kind, opening my heart, and smiling while doing it!

Having a bath while listening to music and singing with the wonderful acoustics of the bathroom.

Watching inspiring talks on TED and feeling uplifted, hopeful, understood, and an overwhelming warm and fuzzy feeling in my heart.

Hugging and loving my precious niece Rayah.

Writing, whether I ever publish it in a blog post or a book doesn't matter, what matters is that I get it out of my heart and head and into the universe.

Tattoos, examining my existing ones, dreaming up new ones, and seeing them turn into reality...once the funds are available of course.

Having a giant cup of green tea in a colourful mug with a good friend, a good book, a good movie, good music, and/or a comfy blanket.

Visiting with my nanny(grandma) who has Alzheimer's, and answering her question, "do you have a boyfriend yet?!" differently every time she asks...which is generally every 5 minutes. (Some people may think of this as mean, but it makes me giggle, doesn't harm her, and is certainly better than the alternative of repeating myself a hundred times and getting irritated and my nanny ultimately sensing that irritation.

hiking, walking, biking...anything that takes me outside where the fresh air can touch my cheeks the way it feels when a hand gently caresses my cheek before a kiss.

Chocolate...dark, milk, white, with nuts, raisins, granola, caramel...doesn't matter in what form or combination, chocolate just does it for me!

Hannah, my cat, when she comes running to the door to greet me, when she rubs her head against mine (ps. she's doing this as I write!), and when she gives me little sandpaper kisses.

Watching a breathtaking sunset.

Looking at a plant and remembering its botanical(latin) name and english name after three years of being out of that field.

Sleeping in...which is rare, but when it happens oh god let the joy flow!

Taking pictures of anything, namely plants, animals, children, and elderly people...anything is life, or colour, or that tells a story.

Four dollar martinis on a Friday night.

Wearing dresses...they're so flowy and free!

and numerous other little things...

This concept of identifying those small, seemingly unimportant things that bring joy to my life, is a tricky one...probably trickier for some...but still tricky for me, a self-aware yoga teacher who teaches others to find their joy in their practice and in their life!  Give it a try, you don't need to share it with others, just share it with yourself!

Have you ever?

Have you ever felt like your brain was going to explode?  Like your heart was going to bust out of your chest?  Like you couldn't move fast enough to keep up with the speed of your thoughts?  Although they sound like they could be not-so-pleasant feelings to have, and at times they certainly aren't, all of these feelings at this present moment are coming from a very positive place.

Lately, I have found myself filled with happiness, energy, inspiration, creativity, and anticipation, which are completely surprising and welcome feelings.

I felt a lot of anxiety about heading back to Canada after being away for so long.  I worried about what the next chapter in my life would hold.  Would I find a job?  Would my friendships still be intact?  Would I adjust and be happy?  As difficult a transition as it has been for me coming back to Canada, I am also pleasantly surprised at how everything has fallen into place.  Have things fallen into place the way I had imagined?  Oh hell no!  Is that necessarily a bad thing?  Certainly not.  I would actually say that I am blissfully joyful at the opportunities that have appeared, the choices I have made, and the people that have remained in my life.   Of course things haven't been peachy keen one hundred percent of the time, let's not be unrealistic here.  I have had a few breakdowns.  Looked up flights to Indonesia on a daily basis for the first month I was home.  Second guessed my dreams and desires.  Questioned my place and role in my family and with my friends.  Let's just say it has been a tough adjustment period, and to be honest it is still somewhat of a struggle at times.

Despite all of my anxieties and fears about coming home, I feel as though my world has opened up with all of these opportunities I never imagined I'd have.  I feel very fulfilled at the moment.  I am working hard but having fun in every moment.  I am working full time at a Hot Yoga Studio, teaching around 11 classes a week and working the desk the rest of the time.  It is an amazing environment, full of different energies and personalities, full of beautiful people and spirits.  I work in the mornings and the evenings, having afternoons off, which is a delightful change to the 9-5 grind I had assumed I'd be entering upon coming home.

My afternoons are full of dreams, thoughts, and ideas.  I'm facing the task right now of grabbing the bull by the horns and making some of those dreams, thoughts, and ideas into realities, plans, and actions.  I'm obsessed with my ideas, researching, reading, planning, and plotting.  I am bursting at the seams with information, inspiration, and motivation.  I am so excited at this influx of creative energy that I'm freaking myself out a little bit.